…from my season of politics.
It never really ends but even I can focus on other things now and again. That is part of what living OTG is all about – a chance to smell roses, a chance to dance in the spring (like the Jules Feiffer dancer below with Jules himself) or, for me, a chance to go weld something or hurt myself. Currently doing both these past few days. For Sally, it is currently quilting – quilting like a woman obsessed. Sally is the quilting version of the Jules Fieffer dancer.
But, I digress.
On to other things.
This time – another death. An acquaintance of mine just died at the age of 57. I didn’t like him much. In fact, I disliked him. Still do, actually. Funny, don’t you think? One would think that dying would be the ultimate get-out-of-jail-free card but, in his case the jail remains locked, he just escaped those mortal bars earlier than I expected.
I won’t denigrate him too much more than I have already – simply by NOT mentioning his name. Just a guy I didn’t like. But I am writing about him because of two things: he died at 57. OhMyGawd! I am already 10 years older than that!
I just find that shocking, is all. His death – my reality check. Sheesh.
The second reason is that, even though he was a bad actor in my life, he was still an actor in my life. This guy occupied some of my life space. He was an influence. Like Darth Vader, to be sure, but still an influence. He gave lessons from the dark side. He caused trouble. To be fair, he caused a little trouble for me but he caused a lot for others and I was caught up and involved in trying to make things right. More than a few times. We were adversaries in a way. But it wasn’t personal. He was in the adversary business and I was in the solution business. Our paths crossed. And crossed. And crossed.
He was like a skin rash that just wouldn’t go away. Well, it was that way for at least a decade or so. NOW he has gone away. Now he is gone. And, to be fair, I haven’t really given him much thought for the last twenty years. So, I think he is well and truly gone for me. Now.
That’s the blog.
Just a reflection of how even the bad people fill in your life spaces. How things you want to go away never really go away. Even when they go away, they are still there in a weird kind of way. Memory. Experience. Scars. Victories. Losses. Stories.
I am not happy for his demise. I didn’t hate him. I could have happily gone through my life without ever having met him but, on the other hand, I will never forget the encounters, the stories, the lessons learned. In some twisted way, he is indelibly etched in my life and he is part of what makes me what I am. I am almost OK with that, even though it seemed so ugly at the time. Who would have thunk that a real-life Darth Vader-type would make such an impression?
And I am sure that someone must have loved him. I never met any of them but I know of one who liked him and they were friends. Inexplicable in the extreme for me. Still, even the dark side has friends, I guess. Someone misses him.
Maybe, in some small, twisted way I do, too. At the very least he was the enemy I knew.