Ya gotta love ’em.  They are kinda funny.  OK, OK, they are also ofttimes mean and cruel, largely dysfunctional and do pose a real threat to innocent people sometimes.  That part is not good and it is sadly true, to be sure.  But, well, they are also kinda funny.  I know.  I should know, anyway.  I have a few of them as friends and one is a relative.

One of the kindest, most generous, welcoming people I met during my ‘learning to OTG’ phase (a lesson still ongoing) was a ‘RA-RSBGI’.  Pretty sure, anyway.  ‘Course the reading material, pack of dogs, gun racks and all that kinda crap gave it away the minute we entered his home but that was background material and the foreground was nothing but warm hospitality.

And, truth be told, no time was spent hating anyone.  There may have been a one-liner about the deep state or government control but maybe not.  I am a smidge inclined that way myself so it could have been another encounter somewhere else I am confusing with then.  They do tend to sound all the same.  Regardless, my guy was a nice guy.  And, ironically, he had married a women of colour and a foreign minority so the accouterments of alt-right, supremacy looked colour blind at the very least back then.  I liked the guy.  Still do.

He’s not alone.  Of course.  We got a nice local guy up here.  Pleasant,  Polite.  Helpful.  Cut from the same cloth.  Deep state believer.  Conspiracy sorta nut.  “The Queen, you see, is in cahoots with Putin and Trump.  It’s a hangover from the time of the Romanovs. They own all the gold now, ya know?” 

Sometimes they go on about the Eurabians (a conspiracy of Arabs and Europeans trying to take over the world) or the Bilderbergs (a conspiracy of Europeans and North Americans trying to take over the world).  Or Skull and Bones (a secret club of the Ivy League colleges that are trying to take…well you get the idea).

It seems a lot of groups that meet secretly do so to try and take over the world.

Ya gotta wonder why?

Anyway, the part I find so amusing is that all my crazy conspiracy friends are poor as dirt, haven’t much in the way of friends or social circles, usually live alone except for dogs and/or the odd reptile and, generally speaking, might be considered rather dysfunctional in several key ways like  personal hygiene, general health, dealing with others and especially with authorities and, of course, women.  They don’t eat regular-like either.

“So, Bill……how is it that you have no food in your house, your truck won’t run, ya got the meanest pack of Pit Bulls ever and yet you think you are smart enough to figure out major conspiracy plans conducted by secret societies all around the world?  Shouldn’t you, at the very least, get paying your hydro bill figured out or get your truck running?”

“Well, Dave, you have a good point.  It’s basically the lack of funds that currently limits my lifestyle as you describe it but, you see, that’s because the powers that be are watching me.  They know that I am on to them.  They are keeping me down.”  

“Are you saying that groups intent on taking over the world are starting by taking over you!?”

“Well, not me specifically but people like me.  Those of us who have seen the enemy must be stopped.  We’ve seen them.  So, they are stopping us.  They are watching us.  Harassing us.  And persecuting us.  They need us to keep quiet.  This is all part of their plan.  And they are getting good at it. It used to be just the poor, single male that was targeted.  That’s why the jails are full.  But now it is poor families.  They do that with the drugs.  They are currently attacking the middle class and that is drugs, taxes and all sorts of things. They own all the porn, ya know?”

“And you think Trump is the counter to all that evil?”

“Yes and no.  He is not part of their conspiracies.  He is an outsider.  He is one of us.  But he is rich so he can stay protected.  Stroke of genius getting to be president.  Presidents get great security, ya know.  So, yeah.  The battle has been joined.  Trump versus the deep state.  That’s a big first step.  Then Trump vs the Bildebergs.  Or Eurabia.  But, by then, it will all be out in the the open and the people will join in. You’ll see.” 

“But you also said ‘no’.  Trump is NOT the whole of the answer?”

“Well, c’mon, Dave.  Face it.  The guy is a little nuts, don’t you think?”