We planted a garden this spring.  Well, we tried to but didn’t really know much at the time.  Still don’t.  ‘Course, no one expects you to know much about gardening out here until you have been here for a few years but we were coming up to the end of our probation period and we knew that we would be judged somewhat by the 2010 garden crop.  The pressure was on to produce produce.

Thing is, having a garden is difficult when you build on granite.  We don’t have much dirt.  Well, none, really.  So, I built a garden box of about 80 square feet and then proceeded to scrape and scrabble dirt from wherever I could find some.  Well, Sally and our Woofer-for-that-week, Aline did most of that.  I built the box three feet high so that I wouldn’t have to bend over too much picking the avocados and strawberries……..maybe a few cherry tomatoes.  But, when you think about it, that (20x4x3) is a helluva volume.  We scrabbled until we got bored and then added some purchased steer manure and peat moss.  That still wasn’t enough volume so we added seaweed, compost and a few dead log ends.  Honestly, we had no idea what we were doing, we just wanted the box full.

Then Sal went to the market day and bought some local plants from some of the local ‘greenhouse’ people.  Bruce provides good plants and so he was our biggest source.  He provided the Godzilla tomatoes.  Sally planted a ‘salad’ garden and that includes a few lettuces and onions, beans and peas, squash and tomatoes and, for reasons unfathomable, Marigolds.  We got Marigolds up the wazoo.

Actually, we got it all up the wazoo!  Lettuce is pouring over the sides.  We have the squash plant from Hell trying to take over the whole box and then some.  We have Broccoli that rivals Cathedral Grove and the tomatoes are the stuff from which ladders could be made.  We have tomatoes like Rambo has bullets.  The cauliflower was too big for the kitchen sink!  OHMYGAWD!  

Part of it is because of the record setting sunshine and Sal’s religious devotion to watering the farm daily.  Hard not to thrive under those conditions.  But, really……………our 80 square feet is producing the same as Abbotsford.  We could fill a Safeway produce section and, in a few days, do it again.

‘Course half of it would be #%$!* Marigolds but Sal claims they are edible so I shouldn’t complain.  I just don’t see myself with a mouthful of orange flowers, I guess.  I don’t see myself eating the Squash from the little shop of Horrors either.  I don’t want to make enemies of that kind.  It’s creepy in every sense of the word. 

When it comes right down to it, I am a little ticked that I don’t have the much anticipated strawberries and avocados but, it seems they require a special touch of some kind.  Like Costa Rica.  We keep saying, “Well, this was just a learning experience and so we now know not to plant so many Marigolds and beans.” ‘Course, I am thinking, “I already knew that!  It was YOU who planted an acre of Marigolds and bought the squash plant from the ‘modern progress lab’ at Monsanto!”

But I don’t dare say that kind of thing because Sal would simply arch an eyebrow and say, “Fine.  You do it then.” Then we’d be back to a compost bin, a bunch of flies and a box full of dirt.  It is counter-intuitive, I know, but I also know enough that to keep my mouth full, I have to keep it shut!