…in the blog.
I don’t know into exactly what the writing will morph but it needs to change. Readership is fading. Nothing like the always-fickle market to give you the news: “We are not buying your product anymore. We’ve changed our minds. We are going elsewhere. You suck!”
Which is fair. Even I got tired of the ravens. And I am getting a bit shrill about politics. That some readers also got tired of my dark ravings seems only fair. Life goes on. And I shouldn’t. I get that.
So, where to next?
I was thinking of writing cheap B movie scripts. Buddy cop-type shoot-em-ups. Cars exploding. Naked women running around in the background for no apparent purpose to the story line. That kind of thing. I’d be good at it.
The new Dodge Hellcat (latest muscle car- 700 hp!) warrants a movie in itself! Billy Bob Thornton and Lawrence Fishburne are homeless guys, ex Vietnam war vets. They get along by busking in front of liquor stores. Kinda crazy but funny. A drug lord leaves his Hellcat running while he ‘offs’ a street-level dealer and the old guys, on an impulse, jump in his car and steal it. “What the hell! Let’s go to LA and then we dump it. So what!”
It’s a morality play.
But they find drugs and money and a few guns in the car and are having a helluva good time as they just ‘boot it’ down the west coast with the Russian gangster chasing them in his ‘vette along with his gang of bad guys in Hummers and G-wagens. Black, of course. Maybe a helicopter. The story line is a chase movie with homeless buddies and Russian gangsters. Sorta Blues Brothers with a short Bucket List meets Fast and Furious.
Or not.
I dunno.
I said to Sal the other day, “Maybe we should try our hand at another book? This time with the full intention of writing a book rather than just compiling blogs. Waddya think?”
“Go ahead, sweetie. I am not in. I am quilting now. You are on your own. Knock yourself out!”
“I can’t do it without you! Especially if it is Dave and Sally do OTG volume 2!”
“No. No! Absolutely not. NO volume two! I can’t stand it! I can’t stand the idea of it! I can’t stand the idea of you doing it even!”
“Good! Now that’s the kind of passion I am looking for. You are in, after all!”
“No, I am not. Take up another hobby for God’s sake. Try fishing or something. Go hunting. Carve. Whittle. Whatever. But leave me out!”
“Whatever, eh? Really? I was also thinking of writing a steamy sex novel, all kinky and all. But I’ll need a research partner. You in? Or do I have to recruit someone from outside?”
“That’s it! We are done here! I am NOT talking to you anymore today. Maybe forever! Your readers are right. You should be neither heard, seen or read and I, for one, am joining those leaving you in droves!”
“You want some tea?”
“OK. Just don’t talk!”
Our Off the Grid Home 
Get a grip my dear friend, people are just awaking from their winter lethargy.
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Nothing like a little “research” to spice up ones “novel”.
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I think you should form your own country.
Its easy! You live on an Island so you’re halfway there.
Declare yourself a sovereign ‘Nation”( everyone else does so why not you?). Create a flag( A one didget salute surrounded by dollar bills on a background of oil). Create a currency( Aluminum beer can labels flattened and wallet sized). Tax free haven for law abiding citizens over 55. ( The Swiss still have mountains of gold even after paying out fines to the US).
Your national animal will be a Portugese water dog.
The First Lady will be Her Royal Sovereign Highness The Serene Sal of Editorial Bliss. Maker of Waves. Delegator of Chores. Ender of Arguements.
You could call your new nation Boom-erica or Balanced Budget or Honestville.
Just a thought
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A lot of really good, well thought-out ideas Ncv. That beer can money concept should guarantee a bit of inflation is built in to our economy at the very least. But, to be fair, we are already tax-free. No stores in which to spend any money – aluminum or otherwise.
The Grand Imperial Empress of the Known Universe was NOT keen on the titular demotion, however. “Serene, my butt! Super Sovereign Severe, perhaps but, in the meantime, bring me his head!”
She put out an APB on you. Stay hidden.
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I’m keeping my head down………..Nothing worse than an enraged Empress…….
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Nix any thoughts of isolationism. As a voice from the fifth estate, you views are very valuable. The media has not written one word on the prawn collapse…you did. The bankrupt fishery policy met with media silence. The regulations that will impact barge traffic on the west coast go unreported in the press. It’s important to hear about the implications of government policies that have little regard for sustaining a life style with environmental values. I realize that for various reasons ‘the emperor has no clothes’ type messages are not well received in some quarters. I understand the impulse of some to shoot messenger but recall what Edmund Burke said, “…is that good men do nothing.”
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Well, thanks old friend, but I wasn’t going to go down to the garden and eat dog poop and die. I wasn’t checkin’ out so much as thinking of changing. But, you are right – a view from the backwoods is different and necessary. I think you are very right about that. And I am one who can still see from both sides of the street. Both shoes are boots now, not brogues, but I remember the cell-phone-stuck-to-the-head-days, the meetings ad infinitum, paperwork, bills, incredible isolation amidst the yammering throngs. I was c-i-t-y. I remember.
And NOW I am not. And the change is still fresh. It still feels like a bit of both but mostly rural. In my heart, anyway. My brain still goes urban now and then. You are right. That mild dissonance makes for a different point of view. Thanks.
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