Sal and I used to host a NON New Years eve party. If you want to have fun, drink, goof around, make noise, kiss each other’s wives and stay til midnight, don’t come. If you have nowhere else to go, are willing to relax and just chill, promise not to kiss anyone and are in your own home before midnight, you were welcome. Come late, leave early and you’d get invited every year.
But, after a few years with way,way too many people attending, that got too intense, too. We quit that nonsense til this year. So, we have now changed it up to hosting a NON party on the next day. Today. This is basically for those who had no party to go to on New Years Eve and are extra grateful for a second-chance pity party, still willing to go home early and have no expectations whatsoever. If you have expectations, don’t come. In fact, we are not issuing invitations anymore.
Because tonight, we’ll have eight for dinner. If they stay for dessert, we’ll never do this again.
It must come as no surprise, but I am not a fan of parties. Never have been. And I feel even more strongly about that as we all get older. Chit chat has never appealed to me and chit chat with people hard of hearing is hard work. Really hard work. I am at that age when everyone I know is hard of hearing and, worse, their voices seem to be getting weaker.
And, is it just me or is background noise getting louder?
I have never understood parties, even when I was young. I just didn’t get it. Still don’t. Why gather for meaningless conversation which is interrupted all the time? I only attended now and then to dabble in the gene pool anyway and way too often remained bone-dry…if you’ll pardon the wording. It was hit and miss at best and I batted poorly, hardly making contact. Mostly striking out. In fact, I reasoned that I could do much better entering a female beauty contest. I would lose, of course, probably disqualified early, but at least I would have more fun in the dressing room if I dressed up enough to get in. Parties were not even that promising.
I always met women by accident, never on purpose, never planned, never by intentional gatherings. I even met Sally at the PNE. She was sitting on the steps of the BC building with her girlfriend and looking all of 13 years old. I was 21 and sat near them just to get out of the sun. My friend Ted was making a fool of himself doing what I had suggested would work to pick up chicks (but didn’t) and so I mentioned the silliness that was unfolding in front of us to the young girls nearby. It was just a quick remark. I really thought she was just a kid. I wasn’t even chatting. It was a total fluke of serendipity that I was chatting up my wife-to-be.
That was close to 47 years ago.
And today feels like day one. I’d do it all over again in a heartbeat.