Input from daughter re blog: “Pick it up, dad! Not enough funny, ya know? Sorry. Somebody has to tell you. Gettin’ dull out there!”

Gawd! The pressure. I only got 22 readers and I have to put out like Jay Leno!

Hard to do with no writers!

Anyway, the kids are getting acclimated. They are now ferreting about the property and keeping themselves entertained for hours at a time. Typically they stand around for the first few days ready to respond to the schedule and the tour guide but it gradually dawns on them that isn’t one – just a little something now and then at the most. Today was a short hike to the rapids.

‘Course, we put a few items on the agenda and leave a few rounds for the chopping…………but, really, this is mostly down time. No schedule. No studies. No work. Just be here for the meals.

Usually the first hint that they finally ‘get it’ is that they go have a nap! That’s right. 22 year-olds who have had a good nights sleep will, when given a bit of free time, choose a two hour nap! “Do you ever take a nap while doing what you do in Hong Kong?”

“Never. Not possible. No time. Sometimes I fall asleep at my desk but everyone does that. And I fall asleep on the bus (or MTR) but never nap in the day time on purpose. It is good. I like it!”

Two of the kids took out the kayaks out on their own. It’s blowing up a smidge. Nothing dangerous but a there’s a bit of splashing going on. My neighbour won’t go out in that and so she called me to warn me that the kids are kayaking in ‘rough’ conditions.

“Yeah. I know. I wasn’t concerned. I’ll go have a look.”

They are merrily paddling with the wind and the current. Happy as clams. Things are great. They are doing just fine. ‘Course, when they turn to come back, things may feel a bit different. We’ll keep a wary eye but I am sure they will do well. Those two will definitely sleep well tonight!

Monday – partII

Kids are cooking dinner again tonight. This is a good thing. I like it.

They were going to cook the snapper we had but, of course, they went to the beach and added a few oysters and mussels to the menu. They can’t help themselves. In the meantime, Sal and I went out and checked the prawn traps and we pulled up two of the four that had been set yesterday. We had 150 prawns. So we left the other two for our neighbour and re-baited the ones we had harvested from. They should all be chock-a-block when they are pulled tomorrow.

When the ‘cooks’ saw the prawns, they were instantly added to the feast. What started out as the ‘modest contribution’ from the kids has become a feast for royalty.

Does it get any better?

Yes it does! While we were collecting our bounty from the sea, Eddie was honing his chopping skills. Another twenty lineal feet of rounds have been chopped and stacked. The kids are coming into their lumberjack rhythm. And I am humming a tune right along with them.

And yoga was a hit! The kids worked out and bent and twisted and marveled at our local yogi. Then, when they found out his age, they were shocked. The kids can’t – as a rule – bend or twist like even an average-but-athletic kid from Vancouver. They just don’t do exercise much and they certainly don’t do ‘sweaty, hard, muscle-challenging’ exercise even when they do get active. Eric is the most active and his response to ‘what sports do you play?’ was…….table tennis! Our Hong Kong 20 year-olds can’t touch their toes!

But all that is changing. They are young and slim and full of energy and curiosity and so ‘working their bodies’ is a new kind of fun for them. Although the bloom has gone off that rose for me, I must admit to enjoying them discover their ‘hidden athlete’ and acting on it. It is fun to watch.

It’s been a good day.

Yoga today. Kids and Sal left at 9:30. They are ‘booked in’ for an hour or so with our laid-back yogi-in-residence-nearby who may or may not be 70 but he is within weeks of it. And he walks with the fluidity of a teenager on sleeping pills. Rikko is as lithe and willowy as the skinny hippy he once was 40 odd years ago. Emphasis on ‘odd’. He can bend in ways unknown out of Circé de Soliel. The guy is goo.

And healthy. He is a walking testament to the wisdom of physically tying yourself in knots.

Rikko, his house, his life and and his partner in lithe , Brenda, will be yet another ‘experience’ of Canadians for the kids. Talk about skewing the data, eh? One would be hard-pressed to find three different lifestyles as diverse as Doug’s, ours and B&R’s at the best of times. These kids will get it all in two days. No wonder they think it unreal.

“Aahhhhh……they do yoga and live on boats and park their motorcycles in them! The food is really different and they have dogs sitting on the couch! For fun, they chop down trees and make more boats or put the wood in a stove with a glass door. They use it instead of watching TV! Crazy gweilos have wine every night! …..Which is not so bad after a few nights……”

But – back to yoga. Alas, it is not for me. I have tried it but can’t do it. Imagine trying to tie a six inch length of thick 3-inch rope into a knot. The rope gets in the way of itself and so do I. How is a guy built like a toilet and just about as flexible act like wet toilet paper. T’ain’t possible.

But Sal and the kids can do it. Sal can, anyway. We’ll see about the kids when they come back.

Instead, I took my inner-but-inflexible zen out to the log pile and chain-saw-massacred a few more rounds for the boys when they get back. They have now chopped their way through about 40 lineal feet of ten-inch diameter logs and turned it into firewood and stacked it! They are a-whacking with gusto!

It is a rare occurrence around here but I love it when a plan comes together.

More as the day progresses……..

Our schedule is pretty relaxed. We rarely ‘get going’ on an activity before noon although there are plenty of things to do on an individual basis before our usually late breakfast. And then, after the event of the day, everyone is free again to do whatever they please.

Eddie and Eric seem to gravitate to the chopping block when they have a bit of spare time and that is just fine by me. But the girls have more eclectic interests. They explore, cook, do some personal matters, hike around and play with the dogs. That was true, anyway, until they discovered the oysters.

Now ‘free time’ is oyster-eating time.

They are pretty funny. They went down today to get a dozen oysters – for a snack! It was a medium tide. So, they came back, changed into their swim suits and went back to the lagoon and went a-hunting waist deep! Hazel was diving in four feet of water for oysters!

And, in classic fashion, she found two pearls!

Eric is small, slight, shy and quiet. Weighs about 100 pounds soaking wet. His first meals were remarkable because of the lack of volume. I swear he ate the equivalent volume of only a ‘small muffin’ at dinner. Less than a quarter of his plate was covered. I was wondering if the food was not to his liking. But, as it turns out, he just needed to get more comfortable with his hosts, the gweilo menu and, likely, the outdoor lifestyle. Tonight he ate two heaping plates of BBQ salmon and scalloped potatoes with Greek salad. Twice what I ate. And as I write this, he and Eddie are doing the dishes in anticipation of dessert! It is like a Wallaby has morphed into a T-Rex!

One of our neighbours and friends, Doug, came by and took the kids on a boat ride. They ‘toured the area’ and then went to see where he lived. Doug lives on a larger boat than the tour boat and, in it, he keeps his motorcycle. He lives at anchor.

Later, when we were all talking about our different lives, one of the kids said, “Oh, Canadians make the impossible possible!”

Naturally, I assumed they were talking about us and I beamed and puffed up my chest a bit. I thought we must be putting on a good show as it were. Looking for a bit more praise, I asked coyly, “Well, that is a nice thing to say. What do you mean exactly?”

“Doug! He built his boat by himself from wood he got from the forest and he puts his motorcycle in there as well! And it is all so beautiful. I would have thought that was impossible! I have no idea how he did that! He makes the impossible possible. I will always remember this!”

I have to confess that I feel the same way whenever I see his BMW sitting shiny and proud in the main salon of his sailboat.

Funny what ‘sticks’, eh?

Hazel. Once again, the refrain: “This is not real. Thursday we go back to Campbell River and then by bus to Victoria and enter the real world again. No more sitting. No more relaxing. No more extra sleep or fun with dogs. Soon we go back to Hong Kong and the real world of so much study and so much hard work!”

“That is true if you choose it to be true. But think about it. When you go back on Thursday, where is Sally? Where am I? Where are the dogs? If this is not real, do we disappear?”

“You live dream life! We students have to go back to ugly world. It would be nice to stay here!”

“I admit that it would be nice. And that is why we do it. If you think it is nice, too, why don’t you do it? Why not let the others go back and you stay?”

“Why?”

At that point the question hits home. Hazel wonders why. And there is no answer forthcoming. She just looks at me kind of confused. The usual habit-answer doesn’t seem to work. A tear rolls down her cheek. She turns her head away and wipes it clean. Still no answer.

I know that Hazel can’t stay on Read and she knows it, too. Too impractical. But she really does have choices in her life and it is that realization that hits home. Maybe she does not have to do what everyone expects her to do…….?

…….or does she? And that is the question she now ponders. To what extent is she freely making choices and to what extent is she a prisoner of her own circumstances?

Of course, we all think about that at some point. I know, for a fact, that as soon as someone is free of an obligation or a previous relationship or even just a project, the freedom feels a bit like emptiness and is soon filled with something else. Often it is a similar burden to the one just released. We tend to repeat our choices. But, really, we don’t have to. Much of it is habit.

For the Chinese kids all of it seems habit. They seem to have less freedom-to-choose in just about everything in their lives. They even seem less aware that they have choices to contemplate. They are programmed more deeply than even we are. It is that kind of conversation that Dennis wants us to have with them.

He is still unsure if it is a good thing, though.

After all, he is a pillar of the society that values obedience, harmony and productivity. He doesn’t feel as if he has a lot of choices, either. His calendar is also filled. And he really doesn’t want a lot of free-choosers running amok. It is so unharmonious. Still, something prompts him to send these kids.

He thinks we are a safe first step to seeing choices. We can raise the questions but we don’t offer the opportunity for anyone to actually jump ship. They are going to have to think a great deal more like this if they are to get off the Hong Kong Highway to Harmony and Obedience.

And, of course, if you get off, what exit do you take? Where will you end up? For these kids, we are just showing them that there is a map with choices on it. 99% will end up where they intended.

But Hazel is in Liberal Studies at the university. It is a new faculty intended to foster a bit more radical (but still safe) thinking. This is what she came for. Who knows where this all may lead?

Kids went kayaking today. Sal led them. Imagine a mother with day-old ducklings…….only real ducklings are better at what they have to do than this group. These guys are all over the place! Eric could go backwards but, for the life of him, couldn’t reverse the arm action so as to go forward. He’d stop, look at the paddle, look at the water and then…..(while everyone shouted instructions)….stroked backwards! Did this for five minutes straight as he backed up in a circle towards the beach he left from. It was hilarious!

Well, maybe you had to be there.

Eventually, everyone got sorted out and proceeded in a fashion around the point and over to the bluff at the same pace as Fiddich and Megan swimming alongside. In fact, Fid was about mid-pack most of the time. The pace was not quick. Nor straight. But they got there. Distance: one kilometer.

Then Meg had decided she had had enough and gave the ‘help-me sign’ to Sally who responded as instructed and put the sopping wet princess on her lap as she and the Asian gaggle slowly turned for home. As adventures go, this wasn’t. But the kids had fun and thought that they could add ‘kayaking’ along with ‘lumberjack’ to their résume.

I may refuse to be a reference.

I have no idea why this amuses me so much. Every time, too. Go figure.

Hazel’s making dinner. “Is it Chinese?” I ask.

“Of course! I am Chinese so whatever I cook is Chinese!”

Can’t argue with that logic. But it reminds me of a weird fact. If you cook Chinese food as Sal and I have done on several occasions, it tastes good and it even has an Asian ‘influence’ to it. But it doesn’t taste Chinese. If, on the other hand one of my Chinese friends makes a gweilo meal (say, Spaghetti or a lamb roast) it still, somehow, tastes a bit Chinese. How is that possible?

Anyway, everyone is settling in. Showers are all falling within the one-pump rule. Dogs are happy. Sal is a going concern. Outdoor skills are improving. Kinda. A bit, anyway.

Oh yeah……..the ‘sleep thing’? Everyone slept in even longer today. And Eddy is asleep as I write (kayaking and chopping is soooooo hard). It’s only 5:00 pm! We are corrupting the Chinese work ethic as best we can.

The girls and Eric are all in the kitchen with Sally learning to cook pancakes. Breakfast is a few minutes off. Eddy stood off and looked a bit bored (disinterested in cooking. Saves energy for eating!). I went outside and cut a few ’rounds’ off the logs with the chainsaw and left them by the chopping block.

“What were you doing, sweetie?” asked Sal.

“Oh, just cutting a few rounds in case anyone wanted to take a few whacks.”

Eddy slipped out, put on his shoes and next thing I hear is ‘whack-thunk’, ‘whack-thunk’. It was like a duck taking to water. He couldn’t help himself.

I went back outside. “Do you need any more instruction, Ed?”

“No. I think I can do it!” ‘whack-thunk’, ‘whack-thunk’, ‘whack-thunk’. No splitting. Just ‘thunking’.

“No strength required, Ed. Remember, it is all in the rhythm. Swing those hips!”

Ed looks at me. Sweat is pouring down from his forehead. The little round of wood (size of a presto-log) is undamaged except for a dent or two. Still very much intact. “Soooooo hard!”

“Nah! Little girls can do it. One handed. Blindfolded! You just need to practice.”

“Oh, little girls with blinds? They can do this? One hand?”

“Yup! Piece of cake! All of them! No problem!”

Ed wipes his brow, picks up the splitting maul and whack-thunks his way through that first piece. He is well on his way to ‘little lumberjack girl’ status. I walk away grinning from ear to ear.

Hmmmmmm………we may just may fill the last two rows of the woodshed over the next few days after all.

Everyone slept for record sleeps! Didn’t see hide nor hair of them til about 10:30 am. Big success!

Funny how we tend to measure ‘good hospitality’ but sleep is so obvious. Last night at dinner I asked the kids how much sleep they usually got; Eddy – 4-5 hours (“so much to do!”), Erica and Tracy, 5-6 hours. Hazel ‘slept well’ at 6 to 7 hours and Eric did a usual 9 straight hours! Everyone was shocked. “Eric! How you do it? How you sleep so much?”

“I only take courses that start later than ten in the morning. I choose professors who also like to sleep in!”

Another way to gauge success is by dog-closeness. Most Chinese kids from overseas are afraid of or at least very cautious of dogs. The bigger the dog, the more cautious. Meg weighs 60 pounds, Fid weighs 70. One of our last students weighed 80. Nobody here is over 100 pounds except Eddy, tipping the scales at a lumbering 115. The dogs look large to them and so introductions are done carefully.

Within the day, the kids are petting the dogs and the dogs are sometimes sitting on their laps. They all walk around in a group. It is always fun to see. For the kids, it is a real eye-opener.

Yesterday we pulled up a couple of logs and had the kids do some of the work. Pretty funny. What Sal could do with one arm, took two of them to do and much of the time, they still couldn’t. They explained that they have no muscles. “No one does exercise. We just study. I have no muscles. Very weak!”

Still, when they manage to do something like chop a piece of wood, they positively glow. A little physical activity that ends with success seems very confidence inspiring for them and they take to it readily. We don’t do much for the kids but I have to admit, getting them to chop wood and swing axes is about as good as it needs to be. They seem to love the challenge.

They gathered oysters and, as usual, marveled at the cleanliness and abundance of ‘free dinner!’. And they cooked dinner, did the dishes and then went out to look at the stars – something they never see in Hong Kong due to ambient light and polluted skies. One of the kids last night said, “This is not real. Hong Kong is real. I don’t like Hong Kong reality. I like here!”

Only took a day.

For those wondering why we have Chinese students here, you may wish to read The China Monologues at: http://hongkongeslvolunteer.blogspot.com/

Hong Kong University crew arrived yesterday. All five of them! They are a lot of fun although jet lag and a ‘tight’ drive 20 miles into the Rain forest followed by a small boat ride keeps them pretty subdued the first day. Afternoon spent ‘getting acquainted’ and familiarization with the landscape, the dogs, the sleeping arrangements and the shower rule: “If you hear the pump come on, that is fine. That is what it is there for. If you hear it twice while taking the same shower, you have been in too long and we’re coming in to get you!”

Typically the students find the first day fascinating even though we do nothing but what is described above and eat. They are remarking on the clean air, the lack of people and the ‘beauty of the surroundings’. The real test is after the first night in the boat shed (girls) or the tent (boys). If they are up early, it was not a good night. If they show up just before noon, it was good. Getting a long sleep in their lives is a rare thing and I, especially, encourage it as it allows me to sleep in, too.

Of course, they brought presents. That is nice. Very considerate. But, this time, they brought extra presents sent from previous years students. Pictures and letters indicating how everyone was doing. It was good. Quite touching, in fact.

We’ll likely start them out in similar fashion as previously; a bit of log hauling, wood-chopping and then sea food gathering followed by dinner preparation and a bit of conversation regarding their lives, our lives and the world in general. We try to get a lot resolved.

Most of the kids are under-muscled. Like jelly-fish, actually. Slim, soft, tender and gentle – and that is the boys! But Hazel is an exception. She lives in a dorm-cum-hostel in Hong Kong that has a lot of athletes and, to ‘stay with the crowd’, she is fit and strong. Hazel has pipes! This kid will be able to ‘do stuff’ and do it well. She actually flexed her arm muscles and there was a discernible bicep.

I was tempted to get Sally to arm wrestle her just to keep her in her place but the pride was so real, I let her continue to think that she might be the toughest chick. I wonder how this will play out….?

Only room on this rock for one tough chick!

Just read of the pending earthquake with it’s future epicenter somewhere between Seattle and Vancouver. Seems the Cascadia plate is gonna get us!

Cascadia’s Fault — The Deadly Earthquake That Will Devastate North America, by Jerry Thompson. It is in bookstores near you. Go get it. Read it. Then move to Alberta.

You have ten years, give or take, before Richmond liquifies and the rest of us get soaking wet at the very least. If it doesn’t happen by then, the odds just get worse. It is not something I am looking forward to.

Our house is built on stilts.

Basically stilt houses fare well in earthquakes (they say but the ones who say such things are the ones left – the ones swept out to sea are somewhat silent on the matter) but, you see, I built these stilts myself and I can envision them popping out like sprung toothpicks should the big one hit. Then the house slides into the sea which, according to Jerry, won’t be far because the sea will rise by dozens of feet to meet it.

Good thing we have Portuguese Water dogs.

I dunno. I don’t doubt the guy. Not really. All the Henny Pennys are saying the same thing. Have been for awhile now. Displays at Pat Bay, disaster planning departments in all the big centres, (especially Vancouver), EPPs (emergency planning programs) everywhere. Sheesh!

I think we are doomed. D-o-o-m-e-d!

Every time that word comes to mind, tho, I think of Bobby McFerrin’s song, “Don’t Worry, Be happy!” Given that the experts get everything wrong and I hear that Bobby is getting every thing right, I’ll go with him.

It’s easier to sing along than prepare, ya know?

Which reminds me: we have walkie talkies. So do our neighbours down the way. We use them like an internal phone system amongst us. If I need to call them, I ‘beedle’ ( a ring tone) them and then identify myself and ask for the person I want to talk to so that others on the system can go about their business. ‘Course, others just listen in anyway. Like the old party lines.

R & A got new walkie-talkies the other day (walkie-talkies behave like lemmings and then need to be replaced) and so they were orienting themselves to the new buttons and doing so by having a w-t conversation. Since it was late in the day, they decided to test the units while sitting in the same room.

(beedle)……“Hello, Ashley here. Robert? Can you hear me?”

“Well, I better go out on the other porch. Think I need slippers?”

(bear in mind, this is all being transmitted .5 km over the sea to my ears)

(beedle)……..“Is that you, Robert? Can you hear me?”

“Wow! Smart phone!”

Who needs TV sitcoms, eh?