I’m gonna sue!

I probably won’t.  But I could.  Rogers is really bugging me and so I have resorted to one of my old favourite threats; “You see, I think I am right and I think you are wrong.  I may be wrong, of course, it is certainly possible.  But after years in business, government and law (OK, I am stretching the arbitrator’s diploma a bit but they don’t know that),  I am pretty sure I am right.  

“But, what is way more important to the issue is that I am retired.  And I am bored.  I have nothing better to do than make this issue my reason for getting up every day.  I don’t have a job.  My kids are grown.  I live remote.  So, I am gonna make you my hobby.  I am looking forward to it.  Imagine the fun we’ll have?  Oh, I know it sounds a little crazy right now but, in retrospect after a few months, you’ll find that this exercise will help you develop as a person.  You’ll see.   I have done this before.  It won’t be much,  just a few minutes every day.  You know, writing letters, sending e-mails.  Filing files. Responding to superiors.  Maybe fill out a few forms.  I already have your name.  Could you spell it for me, please?”

That always gets their attention (if not the correct spelling) and all sorts of things begin to happen after that.  I currently have Raviid, Christina, Ron and Alex ‘on the job’ and we’ll see what they come up with.  I am toying with adding to the threat:  

“Do you want my blog address?  I will be writing all this up, you know.  Every day.  I love this stuff.  You can’t make it up and yet everyone knows how true it is.  The way I see it, it is a form of ‘documenting my case’ for the lawsuit.   You really should read it for your own protection”.  

“Small Claims court only, of course, but that still takes up a lot of time.  Thank God the paperwork is simple for the plaintiff.  You can file in five minutes.  ‘Course, you’ll have to come to Campbell River.  Like salmon fishing, do you, Alex?  Gimme the name of your supervisor and maybe I’ll just subpoena her.” 

“Dave, get a grip!   There are more important things to do with your time”.  Yeah, I know.  I’m mostly just rattling their cage.  Push comes to shove, I’ll probably just shove off and go to Telus.


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