Hiatus

It is a time for me to NOT write. Time to take a break.

It is not so much that I do not have a never-ending amount of crap to spew so much as it is my current understanding, timing and focus on said crap. The timing/focus is off. The timing/focus is weird. The timing/focus is so damn weird that writing about anything right now is a bit like ‘spitting into the wind’ or yelling at an inanimate object or trying to solve a Rubik’s cube. It just feels pointless and weirdly misdirected. It is like the timing/focus is so off, the stars won’t align, the rhythms are off, I do not know what I am looking at anymore. I am getting bad or at least confusing vibes about ‘now’. I can’t seem to find ‘now’. My thinking process can’t get no, no, no, no traction (to be read to the tune of the Stones’ Can’t Get No Satisfaction)

Put another way: I write from what I am immediately feeling/thinking/experiencing and, to be blunt, that immediacy gives me focus and topic. But right now, there is no sense of focus, no sense of ‘what’s happening’. I gots no ‘now’. Immediacy is gone and confusion has stepped in. It all feels way more confusing than ever before by a huge margin. If I am honest and write what I am feeling, I have to now write about being confused.

I.e. Governments are applying ‘stimulus’ as if they have nothing but money to throw at problems. How is that possible – they cry ‘no money’ 99% of the time? Black Lives Matters protests have been categorized as riots – they are not – the riots are a separate group and it is painfully obvious but never reported. The president gets Covid. Russia is shipping vaccines. China is using vaccines. Canada is going the way of a second wave of pandemic. Britain is being crushed by the virus. The Arctic had forest fires. California now burns every year. South America is coming undone. Our otherwise sane provincial government called an election during the pandemic unnecessarily. Schools keep opening. Schools keep closing. Businesses are doing the same flip flop. The White Supremacists /Proud Boys are on a recruitment kick and it is proving successful. The cost of living is rising and yet the government says it is not (that is not new, tho). People are happier NOT going to work except for small business owners who want everything ‘opened up’.

Nothing on that short-list is news. I admit that. But – taken together with other manifestations of madness – it is confusing, disconnected, uncoordinated and it has to be a sign of gross mismanagement – but everywhere? At the very least, it is a lot more stuff than we normally have to process at any one time. In the year 2020, when little got done, so many people feel overwhelmed. Cognitive dissonance meets a world gone mad.

“Dave, you are always opinionated, if nothing else!”

I know. I know. But when I cannot get dogmatic and rant for 750 words on a blog because I have no focus, it is time to step back and try to get some perspective. Normally, I would run to the front of the stage and yell instructions/opinions/directions (if Sal said it was OK) but, right now, I just want to leave the area and go home and wait it out (and you know how far away I am already!). It is as if I am feeling a ‘winter’ coming on. My strongest feeling right now is ‘back off’ and ‘wait it out’.

Irony of confusion – am I waiting for the US election? Or a normal or different winter to set in? Am I waiting for Covid to sort out? Or my engine parts to arrive? Am I waiting to make plans or are plans pointless right now? I feel as if I am waiting for good to triumph over evil but that also seems like a weird thing to wait for.

So, there you have it. I am ‘off-line’ for awhile. At least a week. Maybe til November 4. Who knows?

44 thoughts on “Hiatus

  1. There is a pattern to your latest post that is a continuation of previous posts expressing your dismay with the lack of connection you feel you have forged with some of your readers. I think that you write for cathartic reasons but some of your readers parse your words and express various views not aligned with those expressed by you. Some of your readers do not share the intensity of feelings that you convey in your writing. That is all good not agreeing with you, isn’t it? You have said it’s my blog…so presumably you may write what you want! All true! Your readers as consumers of your blog also also may express their rights to respectfully disagree with you. I stress respectful disagreements. Is that good for you?

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    • Oh, yeah. Disagreement is fine. I like it. It helps me to think. But this is NOT that. I haven’t said anything to agree or disagree with except that I, as an observer-who-blogs, can’t quite make out what I am seeing these days. In a way, I am consistent – I say what I think but, in this case, my thinking can’t cope with all the madness. Ergo, to say what one is thinking is still the bottom line: I am thinking and NOT getting anywhere. I am confused. I mean – the presidential debates were a farce, a debacle, an embarrassment but, more than that, they were ridiculous. They confused me. How in hell can that madness be allowed to happen? How can we pretend climate change ain’t happening still? These are NOT rhetorical questions. They ARE real questions: I wonder how this madness can play on. I really do.

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  2. I agree with your characterization of the recent Presidential debates full stop! I would also add that the bad behaviour on display is also instructive. On show was a bully, rude mocking belittling engaging in personal attacks, playing with Biden and going to a most visceral hate filled speech. Some people strongly approve of such strong arm tactics. They feel some satisfaction as Trump imposes psychological pain on others. Trump has voters that are vicarious bullies. Trump is the lightening rod for their anger. The issue with this anger is that it is inchoate and misdirected. I liken it to the guy who has a bad day, watches Trump, and kicks his dog. Dear God, Fido did nothing except grovel and take a beating. When it comes to glaringly obvious truths like global warming, the contrarian get more pleasure out of doing the Bart Simpson and saying , “No it isn’t!” It’s fake news.

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  3. The disconnect is schadenfreude. Readers that take pleasure in the pain and suffering of others. This is what Trump does as he mocks and belittle others in pain. One of the tactics is to deny your view of the world. It is not that they can not see your point of view, they do, but instead choose not to offer you support.

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    • Thanks for the vote of confidence but the answer might just be historical: As Rome burned and Nero fiddled, the populace drank themselves silly and watched lions eat Christians. I mean to say, “Madness was a precursor to catastrophic change”. Confusion might just be the first stage in the End of Days.
      “Dave, do you really think that?”
      No. I am mostly just confused and looking for answers. There must be some kind of answer to all this that is NOT just ‘taking care of your own backyard’. Do not misunderstand me – taking care of your own community and your own backyard is clearly step one. But, if the rest of the world goes mad, your own sane and healthy backyard can’t survive. Being sane and healthy is a requirement across the board. And, right now, the common denominator seems to be madness, not sanity.

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      • What is the point of, “Get out, get out now!” If you take all your travails with you? Why give a rat’s pjs about the vicissitudes of modern life…don’t worry be happy. Why do others not see what you see? Remember your vow never to go East of Cambie street? Well look at you now. Some evolve, But other people see progress as a new subway that will run via Broadway to Arbutus. More people pouring into the. University district. They see their lives getting better. Others see a gridlocked ant’s nest. Perspective!

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  4. I have said it before and will say it again! Get a dog and walk it around your rock bluff 2-3 times a day, and in the evening invite the dog onto your lap and rub your fingers through its fur. Amasing results almost instantly. Also stop watching/reading the news for one week for starters. Just saying.

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  5. Too much input right now from all angles. We all could use a rest. Take some time to enjoy the good things in life. Just an aside. We tried to get to Heriot Bay for a break last Tuesday. We were almost there (opposite Marina Island) when we had an engine failure. At 2:15 we started a six hour trip back to Powell River using the kicker. That gave us lots of time to stop and smell the roses (er salt air). Other than an after dark docking, it was a good trip on calm seas. Sometimes the stars align when they are needed. Take care. – Margy

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  6. I for one will miss you and your blogs. But I understand the need to take a break, away from it all. maybe not such a bad idea to stop watching the news, take a dog and take it for long walks. I kniw that helps for me….sometimes you just have to bury your head in the sand for some time. Maybe it will bring rest and perspective. I for one am also missing the perspective lately…as you know. Desperately trying to find a way out of this madness and in the same time trying to maintain mental sanity.
    Take care and hopefuly hear you soon!!

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  7. Blog burnout.
    What more can you say when a crazy US President gets covid19 (how convenient) before his next debate?
    But that being said, Hope Hicks is definitely worth getting Covid for…….
    Which begs the question.
    Did Donald get coid and then give it to Melania?
    Or does she even really have covid?
    Only Hope Hicks knows for sure.
    Trumps philandering reputation proceeds him……..

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  8. Trump is incoherent and all roided up. A fly sat on Pence’s head and 35,000 Pence fly swatters sold out at ten buck each in one day.

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  9. Perhaps mr Cox would enjoy a respite wherein some of his More colourful followers could lead the topics
    There a a few commenters that are not around much anymore
    There were some interesting folks

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    • If anyone would like to ‘guest’ a blog, please just say so and I will provide you with my email and then, after you send it to me, I will post it for you – with credits (also for liability reasons, you understand). Only proviso: it has to be at least half-sane. Now, given that I have only seven or so readers and half them are total lunatics, that kind of limits the production potential….
      Ravens, of course, get top priority, and then squirrels and whales. Weirdness in the local character scene is always good (and a constant source of material). The only good rant is a very, very short rant so bear that in mind. Regardless of the content of your blog, use sex, boobs, guns or Dumb Bubbas in the title if you want readers. Good luck.

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    • Hurray!
      They will raise a generation of lazy, unmotivated kids!
      Just like Canada!
      Win!
      New Zealand also allows hunters to use Silencers…..so that the other animals aren’t disturbed by the sound of a gunshot…………

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  10. I will confess to having given that topic a passing thought (or two) but, well, one base hit from three at-bats is only good in baseball. As a writer, it is a smidge discouraging. I really do not want to suffer the ignominy of literary rejection again. Call me overly sensitive. I kinda knew CHOOSING was not going to do well but I had to write it – it was in me and wanted out. But Accidental Fugitives was not only prescient when written and weirdly accurate, it was fun to write. I kinda like old guys and gals as heroes but that book didn’t fly either. A dead Polly. I suppose a REAL man would go back and try again but, then, only an idiot keeps on doing what is not working.
    Hmmmmm….that just might be the best argument I have for trying again…..idiot-man.

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    • Your trilogy has a special place in my library, when it’s not loaned out!
      CHOOSING? I wasn’t aware that was a book. By you and Sal?
      That is part of your problem – hiding under a basket. I should search Amazon?

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      • John, CHOOSING was #2 in the trilogy. CHOOSING Off the Grid was a follow-up to OUR LIFE…..then, a year or so later, we attempted to depict geriatric fugitives fleeing the FBI. Accidental Fugitives. If you have three, you have them all. There is a 4th book called The Flip of a Coin by Jenofer Murray, however. Sal and bookclub resurrected that out-of-print, one-off book by a woman who lived out here and re-set it, edited it somewhat and have it now available on Amazon as a not-for-profit read. If you order it, bookclub and Sal are NOT getting a penny. Amazon, however, is, but it is still cheap.

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  11. No, no….I know that…it is just that the water is murky and silty right now…..I am letting it all settle out….I Hope.
    I like writing for it’s own sake and because it helps me ‘think’ when I put something down on paper (e-paper) and I like to share it so others chime in with their thoughts. But, if one’s thinking is cloudy and/or confused, what to do then? I could write uber-gibberish…humour…squirrels and ravens and such but these are very trying times. Now is the time to write ‘serious’ and thoughtfully. Or do not write at all.
    Since I am somewhat unclear as to what I am seeing and feeling, I opted to shut-the-hell-up. For the record, this is the first time in my life I have initiated such a drastic step. Opinions and rants ooze out of me as a rule. I am a leaky ship in that way.
    But I cannot ooze not right now. I cannot opine or even rant. Right now is different. I only wish I could put my finger on it…….
    Simple questions for which there are no good answers: How did Trump even get there? Who could possibly support him? Why are we putting getting money ahead of the environment? What good is wealth if you are dead? Why are we still killing the oceans? Denying climate change?
    Why are 2/3 of the world’s fauna now extinct compared to 100 years ago? How does Kyle Rittenhouse become a hero to anyone? Has everyone sold out for shiny tokens?

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    • Kyle’s story is sad. He was delusional and became a pawn. Kyle is a juvenile with obvious challenges and was too easily influenced. Hence he becomes a poster boy for the disaffected.

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  12. Resentment. Why do I not have my share? Society seems in the minds of some to be stacked against them. Trump promises hope and revenge for the disaffected. Revenge ‘’as in look how far the mighty have fallen” as Trump attacks privilege. His supporters chant “lock them up!” Taking joy in the suffering of others is “schadenfreude!’ What this group disaffected seems to be unaware of is that a belief in meritocracy will prevent them from getting a fair shake at well paying jobs. For women a glass ceiling prevents many of them from being considered for better paying jobs.

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    • Don’t worry. There is enough resentment to go around. You can have some of mine. My resentment is profoundly ungrounded in reality, tho. I believe in justice, fairness, goodness, mom and good ol’ Apple pie (never big on flags, tho). I was schooled as much by Disney and Hollywood as the educational system. Because of that, I have unreal expectations – the good guy is supposed to win (preferably within 90 minutes). Spiderman will come if it really gets bad. Beautiful women are basically good people. Same for handsome, strong men. All dogs go to heaven and all kids are really smart when they have to be to solve a murder or something. Oh, yeah…I drank the Kool-Aid. I believe in the fantasy.
      The resentment comes when all that is thrown aside. That is when goodness/truth means NOTHING. The rich just get richer. The police brutalize the people. Pigs rule and fly on Airforce One.
      In Disney we trust – but he let us down. He was, it turns out, just making it up to make a buck. And that, dear friend, is the underlying message – make money at all costs and it will definitely cost you – first it will cost you in health and relationships, then in community, then later on with justice and education and good governance. Finally, the love of money will cost you the planet you live on.

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      • I think most of us believed in these fairy tales, because we all need some good news to be able to cope with all the bad news….bad lately, the balance is off completely, more then ever! And we simply don’t see a way out. So I also had my moments of doubt and didn’t see light at the end of the tunnel. But WE have to keep fighting for what’s good in this world. And although we are the proverbial drops of water on a hot plate, the more drops, the more effect it will have. I am a fighter, and I still believe that each one of us can make a tiny difference. But does this mean we have to comment on everything which is happening around us? No, not all the time anyway. So maybe from time to time you can start to write again about ravens, whales and other nice things…at least it will make your few readers experience a moment of joy.

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      • You raise an interesting philosophical issue wherein competing views on the paths to achieving personal aims are evident. Currently anti-maskers protest the efficacy of mask wearing. Society is similarly divided along many paths on many issues. The acceptance of many competing views and beliefs In society carry with it an implicit burden and expectation of tolerance and harmony. This where multiple societal goals are most challenging. The Montreal teacher’s lesson on intolerance ends on a street with the teacher’s head being cut off because his lesson offended someone. Killing someone to defend someone’s beliefs. Attacking others who hold views that are at odds is recipe for more pain and division in society.

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  13. I was referring to Trump supporters and why they follow Trump. They get to see Trump’s pay back on those who have been vexed by changing the definitions of marriage, closing coal mines, the future hoped for overturning of Supreme Court decisions on abortions, gay rights, prayer in schools and other issues. I’m taking about the so called ‘’deplorables” that Hilary labeled. Make America great again by returning to socially conservative values: faith in God. fight sin. Hate Democrates. Get rid of affordable health care. And other irrational stuff.

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  14. Dave.
    Its time for you to build a cave on top of a mountain and take some books, tea, crackers, etc… for enlightenment.
    While the gals have “Book Club” … YOU could take books AND a club up to your Buddhist Nirvana just in case there’s hungry wildlife…..
    Just dont forget to take a cell phone so they can call you when they’re done.

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    • Thanks for that. It’s a plan, I guess…and simple plans have the best chance of working…that’s for sure…..but, but, but…me? Enlightened? I do not think that is my aspiration. I prefer the dark. I prefer not-knowing.
      Mind you, I like searching, learning and discovering, too, but as you know, learning the truth is really hard. Second best is denial and the booby prize of ignorance is considered bliss. Dumb Bubbas are happy Bubbas. I wanna search for the truth but hope I never find it.
      Hmmm….you think it is to be found in a cave near the top of a mountain with hungry animals all around me…..?

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      • Not looking for enlightenment eh? That might rule out the Buddhist like quest in a cave. But what about those who continue to work against their own best self interest by voting for the trumps of the world? Are not these not the ones that vex you?

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      • I don’t see you as a person who prefers not-knowing. From what I have read here, you are in constant search for why’s….and not finding the answer makes you uneasy and has brought you in this state. Like why is there so much stupidity in this world and why do we destroy the planet we are living on….liking sawing of the branch of the tree we are sitting on. But the looking for why’s is in your personality…so why fight it?

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  15. I have a hummingbird zipping around the shop in late Oct.
    Its been here a few weeks
    I have a few flowering plants that he’s been feeding at so I put out a feeder.
    Now there’s two little guys battling for supremacy.
    I’m going to rig up a 7Watt “heater” lightbulb on the weekend so it wont freeze.

    THAT is what amuses me in my rare spare time off.

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