Last sane man standing

A reader asked me, “Ya know, if everything goes all to hell, you are in a better position, aren’t you?  You can hang in there.  You must feel more independent?”

“Yeah.  We have food, tools and we are pretty remote.  We feel pretty independent.  We’ll last.”

And it is true.  To a point.  But independence is a state of mind as well as stored dry goods (and enough toilet paper to allow civilization to get started back up again).  But if you really use that state of mind/grey matter then you’d have to conclude that we are just as vulnerable as the next old person in an extended care facility.

One has to face the facts.  If it all goes to hell in a handbasket, my piddly little stored-beans handbasket isn’t going to suffice for very long.  So, our state of mind is not as confident of independence as you might think.  We would not be as independent as I thought we might be, anyway.  Certainly not long term.

I guess what I am saying is this: we are pretty well set up for a short-to-medium term interruption in the way the world generally works.  An earthquake or something.  A ferry strike.  NHL lockout.  Or the walk-out of the Great Canadian Superstore employees.  We could easily go three months and, with a little work, probably six.  In an apocalypse, we are good for say a year.  It would be bleak, of course.  Probably depressing.  No Netflix, for instance.  But doable.

We’d be eating bugs and living off body fat but, in my case anyway, that should give me in excess of an extra six months.  Not bad.  Not really.  Not for me, anyway.  Sal would be toast, tho.  No body fat.  Poor sap!  But that is the extent of it.  Six months easy.  Six months more with hard time.

But by the time a year of Armegeddon is on the books, we are left as bereft and wanting as the rest of the survivors.  If there were any.

And, of course, there would be some.  But then I got to thinking…‘who would they likely be?’ 

A lot of war vets would survive.  Armed PTSD sufferers.  NRA types.  ‘Course all the Homeland Security types, too.  Police.  Hells Angels.  And then there would be those ‘Minutemen’, survivalists, vigilante border patrols, drug cartels and Idaho militia types. Sociopaths would likely do well.  Gun collectors.  Al Queda.  And there might be a lot of your basic, standard run-of-the-mill crazies who already live underground and survive off of pop tarts and pizza as it is.

There’d be the other remote people like us (most of them weird – like us), and young women with big bosoms would make it, of course.  They are the ultimate survivalists.  Old, ugly rich people might last too but, then again, they might be the first to go as a result of chance encounters with the first groupings.  But their wives would likely make it.  The second or third ones, anyway.  Trophy wives are a shoe-in.

You can see where this is going can’t you?  Even a sane, capable, nice guy and his wife with independent means (well, tools, boats and beans, anyway) wouldn’t fit in.  There is very little room in the world today for normal and healthy as it is.  Sane has already left the building.  So, post Armegeddon?  There would be no room for us at all.

Bottom line: we’d last longer but we would not last.  Our best before date is much the same as yours or the old guy’s in the care facilty.

So, you can see why my answer was not as definitive as you might think.

2 thoughts on “Last sane man standing

    • Nervous? No. But….am I watching that thing? Yes. Should the govt. remain shut down for say, 3 months or so, then the general level of civility will deteriorate pretty quickly. Full-blown chaos and such? Congress would relent by then. I doubt it would ever come unhinged but I have been to countries where the social structure and the codes of civility have dissolved and what is left is pretty ugly and more than just a little dangerous. See El Salvador (preferably from a distance). Mexico has some spots. So do most of the drug cartel countries. Afghanistan. Pakistan. Parts of Africa. And I am guessing, North Korea. The venear is thin in many places and wearing thinnner, it seems, by the day. And Americans, more than most societies, are prepared to act up, get mad, shoot first and blow thing up later. These folks are not as inhibited as many others. Like us Canadians, for instance. They’d pop quicker and they are well armed with which to do it. Am I afraid? No. I doubt that it will ever all come undone. But, if it should, it is this kind of thing that historians looking back would say, “It all started with the US Govt. reneging on their debt in October of 2013”.


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